After a night of insatiable insomnia, still have absolutely no idea as to the why or how of it BTW, and sleeping all throughout the day I am now wired near 1:30 in the frackin morning. Should I grab that sleeping pill by my bedside and drift the night away, or try to stay awake all night again in the hopes that my hours will revert back to daytime creature soon? I miss my morning routine! You know, wake up at 5 am all bright eyed and bushy tailed, head off to the gym for an intense 2 hours of sweat and smiles, and hit the ground running for the rest of the day. Maybe take in a show after a 10 hour day, or go out dancing til 3 am and start all over again.
But lately it feels like I am in a rut...a schedule one.
Do those exist?
Wasn't this a great movie ? ! ? ! |
I know, a lot to tell a kid, right? But this path stuff was shoved down my throat for years until I believed it was my own belief. Worse than crazy catholic nuns with left handed people, my hand to God...Oops. God pun.
Kids are constantly told that, until they are 18, their lives belong to their parents. Their social lives happens underneath and in between the scheduled world of the adults around them. We are always waiting for our lives to begin, in our bedrooms or in the hallways of some a-typical high school. So much so that when it is our turn we have no idea. We can spend our whole lives waiting for our chance, that fleeting tiny flash of perfection that is truly ours, but we could miss it in a New York minute.
Boom!
Snap!
Poof!
Now you are in charge of other people, making sure that they have everything they need. The focus is on them, making sure they come first instead of ourselves. Oh adulthood, what a perfect trap you are.Anyways, maybe I should pop that NyQuil ZZZ pill. Non-addictive or habit forming, I swear! No itchy wrists or drug addiction here. I'm nowhere near that interesting. I know they say sex and pain sells, but that is not on the menu here on this 'health and ranting' blog I am running.
Sleep well to those of you who can.
I am off! But before I beg my pillows for a sweet dream, here is a list of some of the stuff I have done to occupy the hours I was meant to be silent and sleeping.
How To Occupy the Silent Hours when Sheep Just Wont Do It!
- Silent workout (mostly yoga, crunches, leg lifts, and stretches)
- Sketch, Draw, Creative yet Silent stuff (paint it out, or doodle)
- Write (blog stuff, correspondence, to do lists for the rest of the week)
- Fold clothes
- Listen to music (tried unsuccessfully not to dance around)
- Watch Buffy, Archer, and Victor/Victoria on the TV
- Pamper Myself (nails, trim hair, tweezers brows)
- Down a HUGE water bottle
Bye for Now x
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